Figuring things out.

Mae: you should just date him already
Maegan: no, you just got out of a relationship.
Mae: but you really like him
Maegan: do you? Really? Or is it just feelings you get because he's sweet to you?
Mae: he really likes you
Maegan: your point?
Mae: he's not lying about the things he says. He told you so. You believe him, don't you?
Maegan: you don't know he's not lying. Guys will say anything.
Mae: he's so much better than Jacob in every way
Maegan: everybody is. And he don't know how he is a boyfriend. He could change.
Mae: he said he wouldn't change
Maegan: again, guys will say anything.
Mae: Maegan, I don't think he's lying. He genuinely really likes you.
Maegan: so what if he does? You JUST got out of a relationship. You don't want that reputation. Your friends would judge you.
Mae: ...
Maegan: besides, he said he would wait as long as it takes. If he really genuinely likes me, he'll wait. Wait a while. And see if he's still willing.
Mae: yeah, I guess you're right.
Mae: *hugs*
Maegan: *hugs*

I've been dressing up a lot lately

I guess it makes me feel cute? I don't know. Anyways, I broke up with Jacob, finally. I'm indifferent about it. Stay Magical <3

This soda is too carbonated.

I am SO sorry.
Not that anyone reads this, but I haven't blogged in like... forever. So I feel pretty bad about that. Things are honestly going so flipping great right now. Like woah. I'm going camping this weekend with some people I hate, so I'm really looking forward to that. Legitimately I am. Because they hate me for the stupidest reasons and it amuses me. See, I send out little spies. And by spies I mean Jali. So she goes and has them tell her everything they hate about me and why, and then she reports back to me. It's a great system, really. And they told her that they are simply jealous of me. So I just act my normal, weird, spunky(?) self and they try to act all cool to get me to like them, and it really just makes my day. I'm going to california <3 with Mandy and Papa. We get to see Uncle Ted, so that's amazing. And I get to have my first in and out burger so i'm really looking forward to that. I have to go to the doctor on the 30th and get shots. So I'm reallyyyy scared for that. I mean, in all reality, shots hurt. No matter how tough you think you are, or if you don't react to the shot, they hurt. You may not want to admit it, but they do. And everyone would get out of them if they could, but you can't. Modern science or medicine or whatever just isn't there. And I'm looking forward to the day it gets there. Who knows, maybe I won't be alive, but I'm really hoping I am. I would love to see that. I have to get a physical for high school, though. High School. Shout out to them freshman on instagram straight flexin! heh, ewwww I'm a freshman. Oh god, I'm so scared for high school. It's ridiculous. I don't even want to talk about it. *shivers* no. nononononononononono. I would rather not go. But I have to if I want to "make it in the world" or some junk. Honestly, I think they over exaggerate things over there. At orientation, the guy at the newspaper booth spent ten minutes trying to convince me that if I join newspaper in high school, I'm going to get into the best college. Like really bro?? I'm pretty sure it's not that simple. But that's just me. I'm watching Aladdin, currently. God, he really is the cutest prince. Just attractive. If he was real.... I'm just saying.  Let's be real. I love him. Does anyone realize that the entire movie happens in only three days?! If you think about it, a lot of things happen that make it seem like it'd be at least... two weeks. Maybe a month. I still plan on portraying Princess Jasmine at Disney World when I'm older. It will always be my life long dream. I don't know though because I'd have to be super happy all the time. And if people ask you questions, you have to answer in character. I'm not the kind of person that can come up with a princessy type of answer on the spot. I mean, if I'm doing the whole meet and greet thing, I'll be fine. But if I'm walking around and some parent comes up to me and asks me where something is, I'm probably going to answer in a princess voice but I most likely won't add something relative to my character. And if it's just a parent, do I really have to say something relative to my character? I mean, they know I'm an actress, I know I'm an actress, let me just give you directions and we'll both be on our merry way. Now if you come back with your kid, it'll be a different story. But if it's just you and me imma holla at you later. Ya know what I mean? I'm just not the kind of person that can be happy all the time. And it's Disney. I feel like if I call in saying I can't work today because I'm not in a "Disney Princessy" mood, that is a valid reason not to come in. It's Disney! They can't have a princess who's not smiling all the time. It's unacceptable. It's going to be great, I can see it. Except I have to live in Florida sooo. I can get a nice apartment by the beach and make it look really Ikea. Ya know, just... swedish, I guess. How does one describe Ikea? You know how they have rooms and apartments set up? How would you describe that? I don't even know. NEW MISSION!!!: how to describe Ikea. I mean, wether I live in Florida or where ever, my apartment is going to be Ikea and Pier 1. And my house, too. Ya know, once I upgrade from apartment to house. This blog took me like an hour to type. Maybe forty five minutes. It's two in the morning. I'm going to go to sleep. Stay magical <3

I'm breaking the rules.

I'm in school right now. Nobody's really talking to me. So I decided I might blog. I'm currently sitting ontop of a counter under some cabinets. I'm short enough that I fit perfectly underneath. It's fifth period. Which means honors reading. Which means I'm with the most oblivious teacher in the whole wide world. I swear, she does some sort of drugs. Nothing really interesting has happened, lately. Nothing that I wanna type, at least. I'm a very sleepy girl at the moment. Okay seriously there are people blowing balloons and she doesn't even realize it -__- I want to go home. Pretty bad. But I have to stay until six for the play rehearsal. I'm not even in the stupid thing. I'm just manager of makeup. I don't even know why, my makeup always looks terrible. I'm trying to make it look better. I'm not going to dance tomorrow. Because I have to stay until six. My birthday is on Thursday! <3 yep, I'm going to be the big 1-4. Go me. My birthday is also the day of the in school play. Which means I don't have to go to any of my classes all day. On my birthday ^_^ I honestly don't see how the day could be better. Tomorrows supposed to be 82 degrees. How freaking great is that?! Hello, summer. Hm, summer. That's a nice name. I might name my first daughter summer. She can be a hipster. I should go now. Stay magical<3

Hello, love

I haven't blogged for fifteen days, and that's not cool. So here I am. I wish I was one of those blogs that a bunch of people read. Not just because I blow their minds, or inspire them to become better people, but just because they think it's cool. Nathan has the hiccups ^_^ he's such a cutie, I swear. So tomorrow is twin day. You know, when people wear the same thing and now they're magically somehow twins. Loads of fun. I'm twinning with Jacob. Two months tomorrow <3 Mandys birthday is on Thursday. I can't say what I'm making her because she'll most likely read this. So there's this website called ask.fm and I kind of want to sign up for it. Have you guys heard of it? I think it's somehow related to instagram. People ask you questions and you answer them. I feel like that would be cool. I kind of want to change my instagram name to "@silly_kitty" but then I would have to inform everybody about it and it would just be too much work. And we all know I'm too lazy of a person to put forth that much effort. About the ask thing though, I don't know if people would actually ask me questions.  So I kind of want to quit Palombi Players. But here's the thing. On the day of the in-school play, I don't have to go to any of my classes, I just sit in the theater and chill with these super cool people until the end of the day. The in-school play just so happens to be on my birthday. Soooo on my birthday, I could do absolutely nothing and just hang with those people. Plus, we'd eat lunch fifth period, which is when Jacob eats, so theoretically I could spend a period with Jacob. But I don't want to deal with the wait. It'd be our four month the next day. Do you see where I'm stuck? I'm really dreading when the rehearsals go until five instead of just four. Ugh, I can't do it. Plus, if I do Palombi players I can't do track. But I can do track at Grant. YOU'RE WORTH MORE THAN GOLD!! I'm sorry, I have that song stuck in my head. Have you heard it before? It's by Britt Nicole. It's all about how you should love yourself because you're worth more than gold. Very uplifting. Jacob showed it to me, actually. Well, he told me to listen to it. I'm very bored. I miss the time when kids could just leave their house, walk over to their friends house, knock on the door, ask if they could hang, and if they couldn't, you went home. But if they could, the two of you went outside and had the merriest time. Then you'd walk over to the penny candy shop and get a milkshake or something, and everything was like fifty cents and everything was in black and white. But now everything is all about technology. And lazy children. I actually wrote a thing about that today. The prompt was "what would be different about a regular day if there was no technology" and you had to include the good and bad things about a day like that. So I went explaining how this generation strives off of technology and we need it to "survive" and how it's a human essence. I'm not even sure if I used the human essence thing right, it just sounded smart. I like using big words. I wish I knew more of them. I should go read a dictionary. Or drink tea. Whichever I so happen to run into first. I love you guys. Stay Magical <3

I'm sorry for.... whatever I did this time

Okay, I was washing my hands, loving my coconut and warm ginger soft soap when I looked up in the mirror and realized that it's been like a year since I've blogged. So here I am. I miss you guys, not that anybody really reads this. I've been good. Schools..... school. Jacob and I are good. Mom knows. My therapist had to tell her. She didn't understand. I mean, it's not like I'm going to have sex with the kid. I don't want to. I'm thirteen, first of all. Second, I think sex is unnecessary. And I'm thirteen. But the fact that she thinks I would offends me, I'm not going to lie. You would think she would trust her own parenting skills, right? She raised me better to not have sex. And I'm thirteen! Those people are at school who are like "Yeah, me and my boyfriend/girlfriend totally got it on last night." like..... why? Why do you think its so cool to have sex at this age? Do you even know like... what to do?! or did you just... you know what, were not going to have this conversation. bottom line, its stupid. end of story. But why is it such a big deal about me dating Jacob? She knew about Geo. no big deal. but BOOM once Jacob shows up, its all of a sudden the end of the whole world. Seriously, my therapist had to tell my mom. and my therapist had to tell me my mom was pregnant. What is this "family" coming to? my mom basically yelled at me for not having perfect skin. Maybe if i was Mandy. this wouldn't happen. What if i did have my first kiss? What would happen? what would they do? Who would I tell? Who could I trust with that? My friends, that's it. You know why? Because they support. They wouldn't get mad. They wouldn't go telling me that I'm being an idiot for letting that happen. Because they know that he wouldn't want to go any farther. I wouldn't let him go any farther. Maybe I can tell them not because "they're just stupid thirteen year olds too" but because they understand thirteen year olds better. Because if something were to happen, we'd link arms and build a wall. Its called always being there for people, Understanding. Maybe if adults thought like a thirteen year old (maybe not guys because I'm seriously tired of hearing the walking hormone excuse) and maybe if they listened, we wouldn't be having this whole problem. I've been ranting. I don't even remember what this blog was originally supposed to be about. Mom is all cool with it now though. Well, cool enough to the point where she doesn't cry every time i say Jacobs name. well, I'm going to go now. Stay Magical <3

Dear Nathan,

Well, today you were born. On 2/3/13 at 12:03 am. I love you more than I thought I would. When I walked in the room, and you were there I couldn't help my self and I cried. I cried not out of sadness, but out of pure joy. For so long, I've been the baby. I never had anyone look up to me, or had anyone that I felt like I needed to protect. But now I have you and I promise I won't ever let anything bad happen to you. I know I can't protect you from the basic bad things, but I'll try my very best. I feel bad for you. Here you are, fresh life, with so much potential and no idea what this world is like. You've never been outside the hospital walls. And here we are, bringing you into this world full of hate. But it's not all like that. There are good people. But I'm scared for you. I don't want to mess you up. I love you with all my heart and more, and you're only eight hours old. How silly of me. But I'll always love you, and don't you ever forget that.

Love, 

Maegan

Stay Magical<3