The people who deserve nothing are handed everything...

*cough* lizzie. god i really do hate her. so yesterday i had one of my crying break downs and my mom walked in on it. normally i would stop crying, but i didnt. i just kept on crying. i told her everything. well, almost everything. i told her why i hate scott, how it feels like my life is being lived for me, that nothing is fair, and i even told her that sometimes i just want it all to end. i didnt tell her i cut myself or that i swear, because i was too scared. but i did tell her i did date. and when i told her that i want it all to end sometimes she said i was scaring her. she suggested family therapy because of the whole scott situation but i told her i need self therapy. so i think i might be doing that. if i do i know im going to cry and i hope that isnt a problem. now, im not a whore or anything but i need something (or someone) to keep my mind off of this whole issue. perhaps a boyfriend.... *cough* victor ortiz *cough* or just a really good friend. i need someone like....like maria. i feel as if shed be very understanding. we need to have a sleepover at my house. (got that maria? ;D) maybe i should just stop thinking about it all together. no, because it would be locked up inside of me and i would have random crying sessions all over again. im just worried my mom will put me in a mental hospital or put me with a therapist who specializes in mentally insane people. hm whatever. guess what guys? everythings ok with me and nick now. he was all "im going to start being nice to you" then we hugged. all is good in the world. im gonna go nom on some food.